Sir, A great commotion in the night causes me to rush downstairs fearing intruders. I am relieved to find only maids Agnes and Elsie. They quickly explain how they are affeared of fire and conflagration; they do seek to extinguish any naked flames before they retire to bed. Such dedication!

By RedditNSFW Published May 7, 2024

Sir, A great commotion in the night causes me to rush downstairs fearing intruders. I am relieved to find only maids Agnes and Elsie. They quickly explain how they are affeared of fire and conflagration; they do seek to extinguish any naked flames before they retire to bed. Such dedication!

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Sir, I have hired two Italian chefs to give my luncheon greater variety. The chefs are currently banging and crashing around in the kitchen – presumably the Italian way – and I am in great anticipation of what exciting new experiences they may introduce me to.

Sir, Following my correspondence of the 15th inst. , in which a prospective maid did display her Petticoat Lane for all to see, a number of members of our club did hand in their membership cards in a show of some disgust. To soothe the brow, I herein present an artistic nude of my maid Ivy.

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Sir, At the end of a hard day admonishing my staff, it is good to retire to my library with a glass of Port. I have many fine and ancient tomes, and I do find that literature enlightens the soul and broadens the mind. Take this fine piece as an example. Such imagery and imagination!

Sir, Following my correspondence of the 15th inst. , in which a prospective maid did display her Petticoat Lane for all to see, a number of members of our club did hand in their membership cards in a show of some disgust. To soothe the brow, I herein present an artistic nude of my maid Ivy.

Sir, I have hired two Italian chefs to give my luncheon greater variety. The chefs are currently banging and crashing around in the kitchen – presumably the Italian way – and I am in great anticipation of what exciting new experiences they may introduce me to.

Sir, A letter arrives from Gussy Herbert, who is in great excitement. He declares that he has discovered a new and economical method of contraception, and promises to forward particulars with a view to patenting his system. I remain to be convinced, but wish the fellow good luck with his scheme.

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